| Wrong Turn |
6/1/2003 |
by Tommer
|
Spring forth supple breasts! Don't be scared!
|
In the realm of cannibal horror films, including "Cannibal Attack," "Cannibal Hollocaust," "Cannibal Hookers," "Cannibal Rollerbabes"
(check IMDB if you don't believe me), and "Alive," this past weekend heralds a new entry: "Wrong Turn." It stars Eliza Dushku (aka "the hot chick from The New Guy") and it's about the true story of how a bunch of attractive young people get eaten by canniballistic hillbilly inbred dudes. While the R rated film does contain strong language, violence, gore, and scenes of drug use, it does not contain any nudity - full frontal, partial, blurry, sidal, or otherwise. Due to this questionable horror slighting (horror films without nudity are like pant stores without pants!), my grade was lowered from "AWESOME!!" (before seeing the trailer) to "AWESOME!" (upon seeing the trailer and rating information). I do reccomend it, though, for anyone who enjoys watching people get eaten and shots of Eliza Dushku's ample cleavage - her nubile breasts undulate breathtakingly amid the cannibal gore and serviceably average action. Each scene brings the hope that her flimsy white tank top will burst forth and allow her creamy quivering bosoms to gracefully fall out and frolic hither and thither throughout the dew soaked honey blossoms and lolling mountainous terra firma.
[That concludes chapter 3 of my erotic novelization of Wrong Turn titled "Mt. Cleavage" - look for it...somewhere!]
|
 |
 |
