| On Gard Ladies! |
5/19/2006 |
by Jon
|
A picture downloaded from www.jonwellingtonsfutureactionbonanza.com
|
All right team Wellington. Let’s do this. It has been a long time since I last spoke to all my loyal fans (HEY MOM!!) and believe me; revelations have been popping up all over my body. Though I am relieved that with each new revelation one of the painful rashes dissipates. PRAISE THE LORD!
One of the biggest revelations for me is that it is time to get out into the dating world. I need to take this show on the road and start scaring the public, well more specifically, public women. I have made great strides in my life and I believe it’s time to dust the cobwebs off the JW Charm machine (charmometer) and get out there!
But who?
I don’t know many women, and the ones I do know are either taken, or hot lesbians. Well, also the small portion that aren’t actually women, but man is their makeup and small genital bulge convincing!
So what is the answer lady-master Jon? Well, I figure I will start going after randoms by picking different careers and every women I encounter that looks around my age in that profession, I am going to ask out. Nothing too complicated too.
“Hi, my name is Jon Wellington, I’m a 25 year old lumber salesman, can I take you out to dinner.” Simple huh? Beats the old method. “Oh my gosh, looks like my penis fell out of my pants again.” That didn’t work too hot, especially because I didn’t ever want to show my ding a ling, so I usually would just write the word penis on a banana or avocado and then just go for it.
I find that didn’t impress ladies. Go figure?
So the first profession I randomly decided on was the ever mysterious Deli clerk. Any lady that works in a deli around my age, I am going for.
But I need your help team. I need you to give me professions, from the mundane to the extreme. I will honor every request. If you tell me mortician, then by hell if I can find one I am jumping in the grave. I will take pictures the best I can and have an account after each endeavor. Successful and non-successful I will not discriminate. Hell, failure makes for better stories anyhow. So please write, whether I know you or don’t, I will welcome all suggestions and I will act upon them.
A new day has dawned my friends. JR_Wellington@hotmail.com
LADIES, LET US DO BATTLE!
|
 |
 |
